Friends, Hyderabadis, countrymen, lend me your ears;
I come to criticize Airtel, not to praise it.
The evil that Airtel does lives on and on;
The good is oft interred with their schemes;
So let it be. The noble Airtel
Hath told us their schemes were just:
If it were so, it was a grievous fault;
And grievously hath I answer'd it.
By dumping Airtel and their schemes, --
Airtel seemed an honourable company;
So are they all, all honourable companies, --
Airtel, Hutch, Tata Indicom...
Come I to speak about Airtel and the rest.
They pretend to be our friends, faithful and just to us:
But the world says they are righteous;
And the world is full of honourable men.
Airtel hath brought many hapless people into their schemes.
Whose pre- and postpaids did their general coffers fill:
Did this in Airtel seem righteous?
When that the poor have cried, Airtel hath laughed:
Markets should be made of kinder stuff:
Yet they say the rates are competitive;
And they are all are honourable men.
You did see that there seems to be no relationship
Between recharge, talk time and validity
Any which way we look at it, we lose: is this justice?
Yet our leaders say this is righteous;
And, sure, they are honourable men.
I speak not to disprove what Airtel does,
But here I am to speak what I do know.
We all did love Airtel once, --not without cause:
What cause withholds you, then, to criticize them now?
O judgement, thou art fled to brutish beasts,
And men have lost their reason! --Bear with me;
My heart is in the right place and my head too,
And I must pause till things get better with the wired world.
(With due apologies to William Shakespeare, and thanks too, for the inspiration)